Current issues of the Congressional Prayer Caucus

Current Issues

http://forbes.house.gov/prayercaucus/

Opposing hostility towards faith in the Air Force
Congressman Randy Forbes joined Congressman Diane Black and Congressman Todd Akin in sending a letter signed by 66 Members of Congress urging Secretary of Defense Leon Panetta to investigate a pattern of hostility towards faith in the United States Air Force.  Over the last year, the Air Force has repeatedly capitulated to pressure from outside groups to remove religious symbols and references to faith from the service.  The letter calls on Secretary Panetta to issue clear Department of Defense policy guidance, consistent with our Constitution, to preserve the place of religious expression in the military at large.

Urging the President to preserve religious hiring rights
Congressman Randy Forbes and Congressman Mike McIntyre sent a letter to President Obama, urging him to maintain current policies that allow faith-based organizations that consider religious criteria in their employment decisions to perform contract work for the federal government.

Supporting legislative prayer at the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Eleventh Circuit
Thirteen Members of the House of Representatives have joined the Family Research Council (FRC) in submitting an amicus curiae brief to the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Eleventh Circuit in support of legislative prayer.  The Lakeland City Commission in Florida had a policy of inviting clergy to offer invocations at the beginning of its meetings.  The Atheists of Florida sued, arguing that because most of the prayers were offered by Christian clergy, the prayers were “too sectarian” and thus violated the Establishment Clause.  The brief submitted by the Members argues that courts do not have the jurisdiction to delve into the inner workings of a deliberative body’s meetings because of the constitutional separation of powers between the branches of government.

Supporting the freedom of school boards to open meeting with prayer
Members of the Prayer Caucus are supporting a resolution introduced by Congressman Tim Walberg that supports the freedom of school boards to open meetings with prayer.  H.Res.662 expresses the sense of the House of Representatives that school boards are deliberative bodies similar to city and county councils and state legislatures, and should be treated as such for purposes of analyzing the constitutionality of their prayer policies.

Working to protect the symbols and traditions of Christmas
Members of the Prayer Caucus are supporting H.Res.489, introduced by Congressman Doug Lamborn, which expresses the sense of the House of Representatives that the symbols and traditions of Christmas should be protected for use by those that celebrate Christmas.  Each year during the Christmas season, there are increasing efforts to remove religious symbols and references from the holiday.  H.Res.489 emphasizes that the First Amendment does not require bans on religious references to Christmas, and supports the use of these symbols by those who celebrate Christmas.

Urging Vanderbilt University to protect religious student groups
In October of 2011, Congressman Randy Forbes led 22 Members of Congress in sending a letter to Chancellor Nicholas Zeppos of Vanderbilt University, urging him to ensure that the school’s nondiscrimination policy was not being interpreted in a manner that discriminated against religious student groups.  Several religious student organizations at Vanderbilt, including the Christian Legal Society and the Fellowship of Christian Athletes, were placed on “provisional status” for requiring their student leaders to share the groups’ religious beliefs.  Thirty-five Members then sent another letter in May of 2012, expressing continuing concern that the school’s nondiscrimination policy requires all student groups to open leadership positions to all students, yet exempts fraternities and sororities from the requirement while refusing to exempt religious student groups.

Fighting attempts to remove “Under God” from the Pledge of Allegiance
Members of the Congressional Prayer Caucus lead in sending a letter to NBC, expressing concern over the network’s omissions of “under God” from the Pledge of Allegiance twice in a video montage aired during coverage of the U.S. Open.  In response to the letter sent by 108 Members of Congress, the network reprimanded the employees responsible for the omissions and implemented safeguards to prevent similar instances in the future.

Opposing efforts to remove a memorial cross honoring military veterans
In January of 2011, a three-judge panel of the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Ninth Circuit ruled that a cross displayed at the Mount Soledad Veterans Memorial in San Diego, California was unconstitutional.  Members of the Prayer Caucus signed on to an amicus curiae brief submitted to the Ninth Circuit asking the full court to reconsider the case, and asserting that the cross’s presence at the memorial is constitutional.  After the Ninth Circuit declined to reconsider the case, Members joined the American Center for Law and Justice (ACLJ) in submitting an amicus curiae brief to the Supreme Court of the United States, asking the Court to take up the case and reverse the Ninth Circuit’s decision.  In June of 2012, the Supreme Court announced that it would not review the case; however, Justice Alito issued a statement saying the appeal may have been premature and the Court may reconsider the case after the district court issues a final order on the fate of the memorial.

Urging religious freedom protections for service members
The repeal of the “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy in the military raised concerns that service members whose consciences or religious beliefs conflicted with homosexual behavior would face discrimination and disapproval.  Members of the Prayer Caucus sent a letter to President Obama, urging that specific religious freedom and conscience protections be adopted during implementation of the repeal to formally assure all Americans that our citizens need not leave their faith at home when they volunteer to serve.

Affirming America’s rich spiritual heritage
Co-chairmen of the Congressional Prayer Caucus, Congressman Forbes and Congressman McIntyre, reintroduced legislation to recognize our nation’s religious history.  H.Res.253, America’s Spiritual Heritage Resolution, affirms the rich spiritual and diverse religious history of our nation’s founding and subsequent history, and designates the first week in May as America’s Spiritual Heritage Week.

Working to decrease frivolous lawsuits challenging public expressions of religion
Members of the Prayer Caucus are supporting H.R.2023, introduced by Congressman Dan Burton, which would ensure that the legal system is not used to extort money from state and local governments through frivolous lawsuits against public expressions of religion.  H.R. 2023 would not prevent parties from filing lawsuits alleging Establishment Clause violations, but it would require each side to pay its own attorneys’ fees.  The bill would limit the remedies available to the suing party, so the only relief available would be that the state or local government would be required to stop its public expression of religion, if the court deems it unconstitutional.  The result would be a decrease in frivolous lawsuits and the assurance that state and local governments are not intimidated into halting constitutional public expressions of religion.

Recognizing the significant impact of the Ten Commandments on America’s development
Members of the Prayer Caucus are supporting H.Res.211, introduced by Congressman Louie Gohmert, which recognizes the significant contribution that the Ten Commandments have made in shaping America’s principles, institutions, and national character.  The bill supports designating the first weekend in May as “Ten Commandments Weekend.”

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The first prayer uttered in Congress:

The First Prayer in Congress
“O Lord our Heavenly Father, high and mighty King of kings, and Lord of lords, who dost from thy throne behold all the dwellers on earth and reignest with power supreme and uncontrolled over all the Kingdoms, Empires and Governments; look down in mercy, we beseech Thee, on these our American States, who have fled to Thee from the rod of the oppressor and thrown themselves on Thy gracious protection, desiring to be henceforth dependent only on Thee. To Thee have they appealed for the righteousness of their cause; to Thee do they now look up for that countenance and support, which Thou alone canst give. Take them, therefore, Heavenly Father, under Thy nurturing care; give them wisdom in Council and valor in the field; defeat the malicious designs of our cruel adversaries; convince them of the unrighteousness of their Cause and if they persist in their sanguinary purposes, of own unerring justice, sounding in their hearts, constrain them to drop the weapons of war from their unnerved hands in the day of battle!

Be Thou present, O God of wisdom, and direct the councils of this honorable assembly; enable them to settle things on the best and surest foundation. That the scene of blood may be speedily closed; that order, harmony and peace may be effectually restored, and truth and justice, religion and piety, prevail and flourish amongst the people. Preserve the health of their bodies and vigor of their minds; shower down on them and the millions they here represent, such temporal blessings as Thou seest expedient for them in this world and crown them with everlasting glory in the world to come. All this we ask in the name and through the merits of Jesus Christ, Thy Son and our Savior.

Amen.”

Reverend Jacob Duché
Rector of Christ Church of Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
September 7, 1774, 9 o’clock a.m.

There is a glimmer

Written by Sandra Lloyd

Fog is all around us.  It is thick, heavy, oppressive.

Somewhere, in humility, there is a mother on her knees, weeping.  She does not weep for herself.  She weeps for her children; for the grandchildren she had hoped to have some day, but now, she’s no longer sure that is something she can look forward to.

Somewhere in America tonight, an aged WWII veteran, tattered Bible in his lap, sits alone under the light of a small lamp, sorrow heavy in his chest. It was the 4th day of his fast.  As is his habit at this time every night,  he cries out to God, who has seen Him through 94 years, to please, please have mercy on this wicked and foolish generation that is squandering what so many of his brothers-in-arms died for, to please turn the tide.

In a tiny town in Texas, there is an old woman, widow of a pastor, they’d served faithfully together for 62 years, raised 10 kids, had 18 grand kids and 4 great-grands, and she pleaded with God, prevailing upon His mercy “just this once more”.  “God, its been a long road.  I know I’ll be coming home to You and Joe soon, but Lord, my kids and my grand kids still have some living to do, long as You plan to tarry, and I’m asking not because we deserve it, for we do not, won’t you please forgive us, this wayward nation?  Will you raise up a voice with Holy Spirit fire, soften the hardened hearts and consciences of wayward folks, like my youngest son, who once knew better, and remove the scales from our eyes once again?  Father, that fella in the White House, that old Satan has done a real job on him.  Stopped his ears, blinded his eyes, and filled his head with so many lies that he doesn’t even know the difference.  Got an early start on him.  Lord, isn’t there anyone who could reach Mr. Obama.  O, forgive me that I haven’t prayed for Him more.  I was too busy bein’ mad at him, if you want the truth.  God help us.  Bring us back to the old paths that we once knew, but have all but been grown over from lack of traverse”

In a humble and run-down Christian school, started and nurtured in prayer, sweat, prayer, sacrifice, and more prayer, a mere 18 students gather for chapel.  The mood is subdued.   Finances are tight, and the school may be forced to close, if the economy gets much worse, and support dwindles further, but faith is still alive here.  The students kneel around the chapel, and even the small ones seem to detect the solemnity of the moment.  Prayers go up, silently at first, and then one by one, from the lone Senior student, all the way down to the littlest pre-schooler, they each ask God to provide.

And He hears.

The Lord looks down across the various states.  Here, and there, another one bows a head, and cries out in confession: “Lord, I am tired of this existence.  Nothing really makes sense to me anymore.  I have wandered so far from how my parents raised me, and here I am, divorced, my kids couldn’t really care less if they see or hear from me or not, and I deserve it because all I wanted was ‘the good life’.  I’m so sorry, Lord.  I am so sorry for not being the man I should have been.  I know can’t go back and fix anything, but God, if You’ll have me, I’d like to ask for your forgiveness and if You’ll help me, I’d like to do better.  But I can’t on my own.  I have come to understand there isn’t anything good in me.  For all my conviction I could forge my own destiny, and make something great of myself, the truth is, I don’t like what I have become at all.  I have the money, but without my family, it doesn’t satisfy, and only mocks me.  I’ve indulged every desire, and everything is empty and disappointing.  God, I want to get back to what I once knew.  You are God, and I am a sinner and I deserve hell and worse.  I’ve used people, harmed those I should have loved the best and should have treated as fine gold.  I disappointed my folks when all they ever did was serve You, and serve me and raise me up on the Bible.  There is no one to blame but myself and my own selfish ambitions.  But Lord, for Mama and Daddy’s sake, would you consider giving me one more chance?  I know Jesus never sinned, and He died on the cross to take the punishment for these things I’ve done.  I come empty and with nothing to recommend me, but Christ’s willingness to die for me, and ask that you apply His atonement to my account.  I know there is no guarantee I can ever mend fences with Joan and the kids, but I’d appreciate if You would give me the courage and the words, to try to convey my apology, and seek forgiveness, even though I don’t deserve it and they may not be able to find it in their hearts to grant it”, and on he prays until he is exhausted, empty, and purged.

A phone rings in that small Texas town, and the old widow is startled from sleep.  “Must have dosed off prayin’ again.  Sorry Lord”.  She reaches for the phone and hears a familiar voice, her dear, wayward son.  It’s been 5 years.  “Mama” was all he could say, before his sobs came.  She clutches her heart, and prayer as natural as breathing, pours out to her beloved Savior.  When he could finally talk, he told her of his confessions before the Lord, “and Mama, I know it’s too late to say this to Daddy, but will you forgive me for how I’ve treated you?”.

“Son, I already have”.  They talked for nearly forty minutes, and now it was time to try Joan.  He’d heard she was living in Georgia now, with her new husband.  All-around good guy, from all he’d heard.  With shaking hands, he dialed the number his daughter Kelly had given him the last time they talked.  Good old Kelly, the baby, the only one who hadn’t written him off.

A chain reaction started to take place.  As people sought reconciliation, bitter hearts were released from prisons they didn’t know they were in, and eyes of those who had been wronged, were then able to see beyond their own pain and disillusionment, to their own faults and failures.  Fathers mourned for failing to be the leaders and examples their families deserved.  Mothers repented for putting self-fulfillment above the needs of children they brought into this world.  Teens who had so dearly hoped to see some sign that there was really something to this “Christianity” business, witnessed something they recognized as authentic, and were relieved to be able to give church another chance.

All across the nation, prayers began to waft heavenward as incense and pleasing aroma to God.  Prayers captured in censors by the angels.  Prayers God had longed to hear and the sorts of requests God delighted most in answering.  Prayers of confession and repentance.  Prayers of long-silent saints, begging for boldness to proclaim Christ, prayers for revival!

It started out a trickle.  Like the faint warble of a faraway bird somewhere deep in a vast forest, as sunrise approaches.  It grew to a murmur. Fog began to dissipate.  Heaven grew animated and excitement buzzed through the heavenly host of angels and saints.  The sound of portals opening, angels dispatched, swords flashing.  What a flurry of wings!  The enemy, beaten into retreat.

The angels responsible for gathering the tears of the saints for God’s collection, had seldom been so busy!  Flask after alabaster flask, filling and filling with the repentant tears of a vast nation.  The fog was indeed lifting, and the light of heaven was breaking forth on the countenance of many who hadn’t genuinely smiled in years.

It started in the House of the Lord, preachers repenting of leaving what they knew, enticed or pressured, losing sight of God as provider, thinking only of getting the budget met, elders finally admitting that the ways of the world and the best marketing schemes, were useless tactics they’d fallen for, and they simply did not work.  Pastors who had gotten proud, or gotten themselves under yokes of bondage by failure to pray and continue in the Word, and most of all, to look to the Lord as the supplier of all, instead of getting  everything upon their own shoulders.  Others, lonely and pressured, who had succumbed to the lure of pornography and lonely women, wept in profound remorse, and repented before the Lord.

It was only a few here and there at first.  But it was genuine.  They started calling one another up, old friendships that had grown neglected.  They confessed their faults one to another, and pledged a new committment, by God’s grace and with His help, to hold one another accountable, and stop going it alone.

Next there came a wave of deep conviction in the hearts of those members which had various rifts and fallings-out with their brothers and sisters in Christ.  People who hadn’t spoken to one another in years started looking one another up, calling, confessing, repenting, reconciling, agreeing to simply disagree on the things that are not pertaining to salvation itself.  Many of them terribly petty.

Churches that had split from one another, held reconciliation meetings, held sessions of prayer together, and soon they were embarking on joint ventures.  One which had been struggling to start a bus ministry, but couldn’t get it off the ground, soon found itself the beneficiary of a used bus, and a generous love-gift from the other.  The youth, seeing something genuine taking place, came back out of curiosity, and soon were putting their elders to shame, with their own youthful enthusiasm and boldness.  Wise adults took their cues, and learned from the example.  The faith of a child, getting over what’s done and gone, looking to the future instead of nursing old hurts.  They may not have as much time or energy, but these adults started doing what they could, rather than seeing it all as the job of someone else.

VBS rosters filled, help showed up in droves, where congregations were aged, young families started to turn up a few at a time, with them, came babies, youth, a new generation to carry on the work.

And as aging missionaries all over the world, continued to press on even at seventy and eighty years old, the reinforcements they had prayed so long for, finally started coming.  Middle-agers, families with small children, nervous and insecure, they came on faith and a shoestring budget.  But the work would continue, after all, for whatever time remains.

All because someone cried with importunity, in humility, and in Godly sorrow, and refused to stop praying until something happened.  For that is the prayer, that availeth much.

Righteousness exalteth a nation, but sin is a reproach to any people.

Gosnell is guilty, but Christian, so are you.  Obama is guilty, but Christian, so are you. Against thee, and thee alone, have I sinned, oh Lord my God.

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http://www.wnd.com/2013/05/love-letter-to-americas-pastors/

Prayer makes a comeback on Capitol Hill

My commentary on this event and the controversy regarding Cahn: I am  glad and grateful to see this article and share it with readers today.  It could be the start of something very significant.  Doesn’t mean our world will pull back from the brink any time soon, but it is a positive development.  Rabbi Cahn is a Messianic Jew, a born-again Christian, a brother in Christ.  I read his book, and I also heard/watched his Prayer Breakfast sermon several weeks back, which was awesome and everything he said needed desperately to have been proclaimed!  I cannot disagree on the basis of Scripture, to anything I have heard him say about America and the judgment this nation is facing, other than the assertion that America has a covenant relationship with God because our founding fathers made one.  (God is the initiator of covenants, not man).  But as Christians, if Christians enter into an endeavor for the Lord, that He has called and led them to, we are not supposed to put hand to the plow, and then look back, for “that man is not worthy of the kingdom”.  By virtue of the fact that Judgement must begin at the House of the Lord, I see Rabbi Cahn as a bold prophet in the “forth-telling” sense.  He is not bringing “new Revelation”, but a call to repentance and renewed obedience to the Revelation via the Holy Bible, that we already have.  A return to the old paths.  We live in a generation which believes “new” always means better.  Some good old-fashioned remorse and sorrow for our waywardness could be such a refreshment to this once-great nation.  Cleansing.  I just do not believe that Hollywood or D.C. or mainstream press, or modern American Academia represent the majority of people in this nation, nor their values, nor their hearts.  Let us not be weary in well-doing.  Lord renew our strength and our hope, give us the wherewithal to continue to come against the evil in the name of Jesus and power of the Holy Spirit within us.  Wherever we are, and whatever our part, help us to do it heartily, as unto God, and not unto men.

Lawmakers, Christian Leaders Join in Unique Prayer Meeting on Capitol Hill

8:30PM EDT 5/13/2013 Gina Meeks

Jonathan Cahn

The House of Representatives became a house of prayer on Wednesday as lawmakers and Christian leaders met in a rare public gathering to ask God for wisdom and humility, and to bless America so it can be a blessing to the rest of the world.

Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-Minn.), Rep. Duncan Hunter (R-Calif), former House Speaker Newt Gingrich, current Speaker of the House John Boehner and several other prominent lawmakers joined pastors and ministry leaders for the exclusive prayer meeting that followed a historic assembly last year. On May 8, 2012, a Christian organization was granted access to the Great Hall for the first time in more than 100 years for “Washington – A Man of Prayer.” The second annual event was held on the same day this year in honor of the 224th inaugural anniversary of President George Washington.

Since the anniversary of his inauguration, April 30, 1789, falls annually during the week of the National Day of Prayer, the first Thursday in May, this time serves as an opportunity for members of both Houses to assemble in historic Statuary Hall, once the meeting place of the House of Representatives, and prayerfully commit America to God.

The ceremony also featured brief history lessons about Washington from Gingrich and Christian author Eric Metaxas, who warned of the increasing attack on religious liberty. Bachmann, Family Research Council President Tony Perkins, and rabbi Jonathan Cahn, the best-selling author of The Harbinger, also spoke. Other lawmakers present at the event this year included Rep. Doug LaMalfa (R-Calif.), Rep. Vicky Hartzler (R-Mo.), Rep. Mike McIntyre (D-N.C.), Rep. Robert Pittenger (R-N.C.), Rep. James Lankford (R-Okla.) and Rep. Louie Gohmert (R-Texas).

“Tonight we stand in the city that bears the name of our first president to … lift up our prayers to the Almighty,” Cahn said. “We’ve gathered here on Capitol Hill, the most exalted of national councils, to acknowledge that even the most powerful of nations cannot rise and will not endure apart from the will of the Almighty.”

Cahn spoke boldly of America’s spiritual descent, the nation’s connection to Israel and the warnings of judgment on America that mirror those in ancient Israel. Despite later revealing that he sensed a spiritual attack during the event, he concluded his address with a call to repentance to usher in national prayer and revival. After receiving a standing ovation, Cahn later was invited to conclude the event by leading the group in the Aaronic Blessing, which those attending joined in by lifting their hands to send out a blessing from Capitol Hill to America.

Goin’ home!

Will you pray for me?

This is a pre-scheduled post.  I will be checking e-mails during the sabbatical, but if if you leave a comment and it doesn’t show up right away, it is because I am not on here to moderate and approve it.  Don’t worry, I will read it even if I don’t respond right away and it will show up eventually.  If you are a regular commenter or have commented at least once, your comment may also appear immediately. 

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All my life I have been a writer (and by that I mean, a person who likes to write and is good at it, not a person who gets paid to do so.  (Yet)  Writing was such a fundamental activity to me, that it never even occurred to me that it was actually my gift.  That’s me.  Always figuring things out in reverse.  I remember watching the Waltons.  John-boy at his desk, writing in his journal at the end of each day.  The poignancy of that made an indelible impression on my heart.  I think that may have been where I got the idea of keeping a diary.  Before I was a writer, I had a love of reading.  I didn’t know that about myself either, until one day my friend Delilah and I were together in the library in 2nd or 3rd grade.  The school library inspired awe in me the very first time I walked in there in first grade wearing my red corduroy jumper with the giant oval mother-of-pearl buttons in 1970.  (My Mom made that dress  for me).

I remember being in that library with my friend Lila, and we were somehow given some liberty to just walk around and browse on our own.  Being a timid kid, that was exciting all by itself, but when Lila went straight for the “big kid” books, I can remember a flush of excitement like entering forbidden territory.  I was leery at the same time, afraid we might get in trouble.  She started pulling things off the shelf, and saying “oh, this is good, you would like that story”.  I looked what was surely a 100-page book, and back up at her her with some incredulity and more than a little awe, and asked: “You’ve read that?!?”  Nonchalantly, she gave a one-shoulder shrug and said “sure, I’ve read all of these too“.  She continued to pull things off the shelf, and with rising urgency I nearly shouted: “We can’t take out 3 books!“

“Sure you can, dummy! You can take as many as you want!”‘ (She is the only friend I have who is even more blunt than I am, and it’s my favorite thing about her!)

Well, I took every one she recommended.  Island of the Blue Dolphins, Betsy, Tacy and Tib, The Boxcar Children.

I lugged them home and read every one of them in a week, and couldn’t wait to go back for more.  And that is my “how we met” narrative of my love affair with words, writing, and books.

Fast-forward a few decades, and I have figured out that I have a natural flair for articulating things.  My ability isn’t broad.  I’m strictly non-fiction.  There is simply too much richness in what is real and true, for me to want to go into fiction.  Though I can certainly understand the appeal of the challenge which must accompany fiction-writing.  This cookie just wasn’t cut that way.

After all that I have lived through, there is definitely a story in all of that, stored in my head and waiting to make it’s way out here.  My problem, and this transcends just the dilemma of writing, is that I have a lot of facets.  Only, I would describe my facets more accurately by using the word “fragments”.  Though my trials and tribulations are nothing, compared some of the horrors through which  some people have lived, there is, I believe a singular value in my particular bag of troubles and experiences.  It adds up to something from which others may glean encouragement, if I will share them.  And that is the hard part.

You see, that is the catch in having God turn your fragments into a mosaic.  You have to offer them up.

And so, you see, those of you who have been here from the beginning, this blog is much more than a news site.  Though I have longed for heaven since I was a little girl, my longing in more recent years, has been ever-increasing as my body and mind grew wearier and wearier.  You might say, “well, you should have taken your burdens to the Lord”.  Oh, I did.  I do.  Again and again.  It is easy for you to say “leave them there”, but I am wagering that a good many people who will read this, who have faced down their own giants, will tell you that there is a hollowing-out that takes place, which can never this side of heaven, be restored.

But think about that a minute.  The Bible never tells us the life of the Christian will be carefree and happy.  Wasn’t Paul’s goal to be “spent”? Is there not an inner man who must die?  Perhaps it is only the overly- sensitive who are aware of this process like those people who can feel the cutting of the surgeon even while under anesthesia.  I don’t know.  It is a fact that I am ultra-sensitive in so many ways.  But God made me and others like me, that way for some reason, even if we might be kind of rare.

I don’t say that as a boast.  Believe me, I have spent my life wondering why I see things differently than others, which often leads to frustration and genuine bewilderment on my part.  This is one reason why I love Aspies. (People with Aspergers).  Relatively deficient in their ability to read social cues, they struggle with recognizing the extremely subtle cues which indicate mood and emotion and meaning.  Like squinted eyes when someone is suspicious, drawn-together brows when angry, (well, those aren’t so subtle, so maybe not those, so much as the less obvious ones like body language, and intonation of speech).  As such, Aspies have to work extra-hard analyzing, guessing, gauging, re-calculating, and then feeling coerced by society to portray by means of carefully-learned mimicry, a similar array of emotion in response, when all of it is foreign to them.  (Aspie readers please feel free to correct my conceptualization of what it is like for you.)  Though Aspies don’t generally effusively emote, it does not mean they don’t feel.  In fact all the Aspies I’ve encountered are pretty empathetic and very sensitive.  Yet they are devoid of any falseness, and very plain-spoken, so they can come off wrongly seeming callous.  But you have to stick around beyond your initial impressions to find that out!  So, I guess it is that sense of struggle that I identify with.  I perceive a lot, and I thought I had always done well at correctly sensing what others are feeling, because I have always had a deep, deep longing to understand others and be understood by others.  My real struggle came about after (or with) the chronic illness.  Whether that was a product of the isolation, or of the altered brain chemistry/terrain that is part and parcel of prolonged untreated sleep deprivation, or what, I do not know.  I know that when I lost the friendship of one of my dearest friends over a misunderstanding, that was very nearly the straw that broke this camel’s spirit.  No matter how I approached it, every word and signal was received as condemnation.  I could not fix it.  The only way to stop hurting her was to stop talking.  Somewhere between leaving my mouth (or hand) what I said (or wrote) seemed to apparently mutate into something else altogether.     She lives in another state, and it’s pretty far from mine, so talking, messenger, text and e-mail were our only means of maintaining the friendship, other than a brief once-a-year visit.

Though I have written journals for years and years, as things got bad, they became a place to pour out my hurt, anger, and all the negative feelings, etc, so I eventually threw  most of them away. (I cut out the really precious stuff like what I wrote when I gave birth to my babies, and things like that).  I mean, keeping them would be like carefully putting your garbage into the trash can, and then pulling the bags out and letting them pile up in your garage, never letting the trash man take them away.  I suppose an alternative title for my book might have been “Jesus Is My Trash Man”.  You know, shutting down emotionally for the sake of survival, works the same way.  You take a great risk of cutting yourself off from all good emotion, while shielding yourself from the bad, because, well, your feeler is your feeler.  It doesn’t let you pick and choose, “this one on, that one off”.  If  you turn it off you don’t feel anything.  It takes a lot of courage to turn it back on.  And after a time, the pattern of shutting down takes place all on its own.  It is a truncated way to live.  Not what God intended, but certainly necessary in many cases.  The trick is how to un-learn the process if you are blessed enough to survive your traumas.  Jesus said “I have come that you may have life, and have it to the full”.  I have just about come to the conclusion He was only talking about having it to the full in the hereafter.

Anyway, last March while I was out of commission, I began to pray seriously about what the Lord wanted me to do with “my book”.  Which at that point consisted of the couple of notebooks stuffed with notebook paper and typed sheets, pieces and bits I had written which I deemed worth holding onto.  Not just good in the quality of writing, but good in that while they remained true to my non-fiction genre, they also express some hope, or else have value in accurately articulating what it feels like in the midst of the hopelessness.  Not as a monument to misery, no, just as a credentialing, of sorts, from the school of hard knocks.  You can encourage people with kind, positive, flowery expressions, but I think you can encourage people more when you roll up your shirt in the back and show them your scars, and they see you lived to tell the tale.

As you may have noticed just from reading my blog, I am a little dis-jointed, not-exactly-organized in the way I go about things.  Some of that is my nature, and some of it has come by virtue of the fact that when you have chronic illness, you lose most if not almost all, of your ability to plan something and then follow-through.  As a result, I have become an expert at “winging it”.  I fly best when I fly by the seat of my pants.   When my friend Michelle had a gift-basket and themed-wreath raffle at her church, the ladies worked on it for days.  As the deadline drew near, they had bits and pieces left over that they didn’t want to waste, but were stumped for how to weave them together into something, so what did Michelle do?  She said, “I know, I’ll call my friend Sandee”.  Her nickname for me is “Ms. Random”.  I went in, and I think I pulled another 4 or 5 wreaths or baskets together.  I heard exclamations like “What? How? It took me 3 days just to make my 3!”.

In a similar way, I have historically been “johnny on the spot” in an emergency, the cool head that prevails, takes command of the situation, and delegates to get it done.  But the day-to-day kicks my ever-lovin’ butt!   That is a huge disadvantage of chronic illness.  If you have never seen the video “spoons” you should look it up.  It is the most apt description I ever heard and it has gone way more than viral.

I realized after watching a few of my friends write their books (and working as an editor or proofer on two of them), that I just really do not have what it takes for that process.   Especially the patience.  (I can edit others, but for myself, I will over-think, and end up either so wordy that the reader gets bored before he gets the point, or I over-edit in my weird brand of extremely flawed perfectionism).  The consistency and meticulous re-drafting required to write the book I would want to write, ain’t in the stars for this Sistafish™.  And conversely, though I have spoken in previous posts about my shaky self-esteem, when I am “up” on myself I tend to very easily swing wide the other way toward prideful-ness.  I know this about myself.   It is probably the number one reason God keeps letting things pile-on.  And that is why I have honest gratitude for the trials.  If that is what it takes for God to make me what He wants me to be, then here I am, Lore, break me.  You wanna make a real pretty mosaic, you gotta break that fine china.  When I talk of other people’s busy-ness, and harken back to the day when I “used to have a plate”, I have to remind myself that my plate has been surrendered for the greater good.  And that it is safe in my Father’s capable and oh-so-creative hands.

So I prayed about it all, (“Lord, what do YOU want me to do with my writing?”)  And instead of the book, the Lord led me to start the blog. Though I still treasure the joy of holding a book in my own hands and reading it, that is a dying sentiment.  More and more folks do their reading electronically these days. Well, I posted probably 30 items on my “pages” the first day or two of blogging.  All that stuff in the sidebar.  That was stuff in my notebooks.  For the first 10 days I put that stuff up, and wrote original stuff too.  Talk about something poised and needing to break out!  I had started my book, previously and had planned to include all of that anyway but meanwhile it was molding away in notebooks on a shelf, doing no one a lick of good. Most of the rest of my book was (is) still in my head.  (Lord knows I better get it down before it gets hopelessly lost in there!!!)  I did experience a rush of joy in those early weeks of blogging.  It felt so great to “put my stuff out there”.

Besides my love of reading and writing, my love of my previous work in nursing, and my most favorite occupation of being a mom, nothing else is more intriguing to me than watching prophecy unfold in the daily news.  So when my creativity goes through a dry spell, like it did August through February while I was grieving, my focus here gradually shifted over to that almost exclusively.  I also discovered there are a LOT of other people out there who love it, as my numbers reflected a surge.  I hope those who came for prophecy news will stay for the self-revelation, as those who came for the initial self-revelation have stayed for the prophecy news.

And I am not intending to abandon that, but the Lord seems to be leading me to get back to those roots and not let this other part just fizzle out.  I can not  predict upon what sort of  schedule the next “chapters” of this book will come together.  But I do have a story that I feel God wants told.  And so, fortified by the fact that I have managed to keep this blog going for over a year, (and much to my surprise, you guys keep coming back for more) and also by the fact that I have “e-met” some really special folks who have become like “e-family” to me, I am resolved to go forth and write.

But I can guarantee that before this actually gets scheduled and posted, I will have changed it several times, and will still have a period of sheer panic after I hit the publish button.  The self-recrimination will start.  “Why?  Why would you think anything good could come of your publishing your private struggles.”  And worst than that, as soon as this gets published, I will begin to doubt my ability to follow-through.  I really do operate like someone who has different personalities, and when I get a surge of ambition and confidence, there is always this piece of me that stands apart wringing her hands, and another piece that is deriding me for having the gall to think I can do something.

So I humbly ask for your prayers.  I am asking for prayer partners.  You don’t even have to tell me who you are, but you can, and there are some I know it goes without asking, you’ll pray.  Even now I have the sneaking suspicion that I have a few readers I don’t even know about.  Especially since I yammer on so much that my multiple posts clog your in boxes and I have outright said it is truly ok to un-subscribe and just log in whenever you take the notion to read.  Truly, this blog is not mine, but God’s.  Though I do feel strongly about writing it.

So, I guess that’s all.  Pray for me.  Pray for God to speak through my fingers and my story.  I don’t have to ask you to pray for Him to keep me humble, because I know He will.  But you can pray it anyway for good measure.  Pray like we do for the missionaries, that foremost my own relationship with God will remain healthy and sound, for my life to be balanced and keep the proper things in their proper place and order.  Thank you so much for all the prayers you have already lifted up on behalf of me and hubby and our boys. Pray for my boys.  (They have me for a mom!)  Pray for healing for my husband.  And of course, healing for me too.  Again, not so much physical, although I’d take it if it were offered, but internal.  I know soon enough that we’ll all  be whole.  And that is probably the most compelling reason for going ahead and writing my story in a blog.  If it manages to touch someone, it will do so instantaneously.  Stay tuned for more to come.

Much love to you all!

Sandee/Sandy/Sandra/S.T. Lloyd, Shekinah419 (and all her broken pieces)

Remember Grace

As Christians we are called to live an examined life.  We are to be set apart, in the world and not of it.  In our conversation, in our character, in our convictions, in our conduct, we should be a reflection of God.  The Christian life is designed to purify us, through trials and tribulations, struggles and losses.

And then there is GRACE.  Yes, we strive.  Yes we have a standard.  But when we compare ourselves to that standard, we will always fall woefully short.  Because the standard is Jesus and we are human, still subject to and limited by the flesh.  When we falter, when we are tired, when we have been scooped out and hollowed by the demands of Earthly life, God understands.  He is not so much of a taskmaster that He doesn’t understand the need to pull aside once in a while and just be still.

We are driven too hard by compulsory pressures.  We have to take stock once in a while and ask ourselves what the benefit is of all the ways we spend our time.  Even in terms of our jobs, or the kid’s activities, and yes, even church.  Sure, people are counting on us because we said we would go/do/be this, that or the other.  But how’s your marriage?  Is your spouse getting the time with you they deserve?  Are your kids?  How about the Lord? I mean, just sitting still, reading His Word and chatting with Him about what you have going on and saying thank you as you enumerate your blessings?

We ask more of ourselves than God does sometimes, I do believe.  We forget that God’s approval and love for us is not performance-based.  Our own confidence and self-approval may fluctuate wildly from one moment to the next, but God never changes.

Now, I know we live in a world where self-esteem has become the ultimate achievement.

I am not really talking to those of you who are “fine the way you are”, but rather to those who really live each moment conscientiously, striving to be a good steward of all your resources, whether internal or external.  People who put others first.  Moms who aspire to be a Proverbs 31 woman, teens who diligently aspire to rise above the cesspool of secular school and be a witness.  Businessmen who “finish last” for being honest, but are honest anyway.  Dads who work 65 hours a week, pay child support and still have to deal with a vindictive ex-wife who talks them down in front of their kids.  Those people who are doing the best they can, but never get ahead.  God sees.  He is taking note.  It is not wasted.  He is pleased with you.  And in a world where there are no standards anymore other than to be as rich and as hard and as invincible as possible, you still are willing to submit to God’s measure of value, though it is utter foolishness to the world.

My friend, we are almost there.  You can do it.  Keep caring even when it feels like you are the last.  Keep being honest, even if it costs you everything.  Keep obeying the Lord, even if they mock you.  Stand firm, and while others lift their heads in defiance, bow yours in humility and ask God for Grace for one more day.  Do not give sway to fear or to flesh.  Hang on until you can’t and then trust the Lord’s hand to catch you.

It’s okay. We aren’t all we hoped to be, but God has been working in ways we didn’t even know, and some day soon, we will understand it all.  God will unroll the tapestry and show us the upper side.

“Walk On” by Sandra T. Lloyd©

Underneath the overshadowing of my greatest fears

You walk with me while I struggle to see through the blur of my tears

You hold my hand and help me to walk on

When I knew I had nothing more to give, You made me put one foot in front of the other, promising you would take care of the rest, if I’d only do that.

“Just hold my hand, my child.  Never let go”, You said.  “That’s all I ask of you.  I will see to the rest”.

Somewhere out there tonight, while I am resting peacefully, there is a light on in a house in these wee hours.  A man is suffering, and holding Your hand in his own private darkness, while his wife lovingly does what she promised to do, on their wedding day.

And they walk on.

And somewhere tonight, in a poor neighborhood a woman falls into bed, exhausted, heartbroken as her husband slips away, leaving her in her grief, to hold it all together while no one seems to share her burdens.

You ask her to walk on.

“But we can’t, Lord”, we cry.

“Why should we?”, we ask.

“Because I have a plan”, You answer.

“But I just don’t see how all things work together for good!”

“My child, nothing touches you without my permission.  I will not call upon you to endure anything that I will not also provide a way for you to bear it.  Do not concern yourself with the details.  Some things you do not need to know.  Do you trust Me?”

“Yes, Lord, but it is so hard”.

“I know””, the Savior said, as a great drop of blood fell from His brow and mingled with the tears He cried for me………………..

“But walk on”

Copyright STLloyd 10.27.95

Hebrews 4:16 Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.

Image Source

There remaineth therefore a rest, for the people of God.  Hebrews 4:9

It’s been a hard “week”, but the Sabbath is coming!

He restoreth my soul!

 

A Thanksgiving Prayer by Peter Marshall

Thanksgiving Prayer by Dr. Peter Marshall, Chaplain of the U.S. Senate,
delivered on the Senate floor on November 26, 1947.

Our Father in Heaven,

 

If ever we had a cause to offer unto Thee our fervent thanks, surely it is now, on the Eve of our Thanksgiving Day, when we, the people of this Nation, are comfortable, well fed, well clad, and blessed with good things beyond our deserving. May gratitude, the rarest of all virtues, be the spirit of our observance.

 

Let not feasting, football, and festivity end in forgetfulness of God. May the desperate need of the rest of the world, and our own glorious heritage, remind us of the God who led our Fathers every step of the way by which they advanced to the character of an independent nation.

 

May the faith and conviction of George Washington be renewed in us as we remember his words:

 

…there is no truth more thoroughly established than that there exits in the economy and course of nature an indissoluble union between virtue and happiness; between duty and advantage; between the genuine maxims of an honest and magnanimous policy and the solid rewards of public prosperity and felicity; since we ought to be no less persuaded that the propitious smiles of Heaven can never be expected on a nation that disregards the eternal rules of order and right which Heaven itself has ordained…

 

For if we do not have the grace to thank Thee for all that we have and enjoy, how can we have the effrontery to seek Thy further blessings? God, give us grateful hearts.

 

For Jesus’ sake.

 

Amen.

(Source: Newsletter of VA Congressman J. Randy Forbes)

Elohim, Hear Our Prayers for your beloved

Solumn

My fellow Christians, who love America, it is with sorrowing heart that I bring you the re-blogged articles that I have posted earlier today, and these links below.  There are some very ugly truths which we must face. As a former hospice nurse, I am very aware that sometimes denial is so powerful, the grieving loved one must be gently forced to see, it is time to let go.   Sometimes there is no gentle way, to make them see. I’m not merely some “Negative Nelly”.  I am, as I have often said, and anyone who knows me would tell you, a realist!  I have already mourned these losses, and the loss of dreams for future things, along with it.  Living with the daily uncertainties is the challenge that now lies ahead as far as the eye dares to look.  I am in awe of how God has woven together those who are doing the work of getting this information out, despite the fact that our traditional media around the world copped-out on us long ago.

I sincerely hope that you watched the Trevor Loudon video.  He is not even American, and he can see what we are losing.  It is not just a loss for Americans, ourselves.  It is effecting the rest of the world.  But our response as Christians to these things should not be the same as that of the lost.  We have a bigger picture, the advantage of a broader perspective, provided by the Holy Bible, which is the only light-source that can reveal all the truth, all of the implications of the revelations in these articles.  People are awake.  Many more than were awake 4 years ago, anyway. Many are frightened, desperate for hope and answers.  It is becoming clear that this is much bigger than political parties and politics.  This is much bigger than a slim hope of preserving the stability of the entire world by preserving America’s sovereignty and military might, for the simple reason that it is not, and never has been, America who was holding together the tenuous “relative” peace and stability.  It has been only the very hand of Almighty God!  And God has proclaimed, first by His prophets, then by His recorded Word, that He would one day bring all the Earth into submission, and establish Christ’s own Kingdom here.  God is preparing to judge the nations.  As I said a couple of days ago, this is not wrath.  This world doesn’t know what the wrath of God is.  But it is going to soon.

If you are reading this today, and you are one of the small remnant of people who recognize the hour we are living in, I am speaking to you.  Pray. Intercede on behalf of those still floundering in confusion trapped in the apostate church. Pray for missionaries around the world who are already experiencing great persecution.  All who will live Godly in Christ Jesus SHALL SUFFER PERSECUTION.  Pastors, it’s time to talk about the elephant in the room and get over the fact that it’s not “politically correct” in the church anymore to preach on Prophecy, and HELL.  Pastors need to repent.  Christians need to repent.  Not to save this nation or the world.  But becuase God is about to reach the self-determined limit of His forebearance.  Pray for the lost, the same ones you have been praying for and sharing the gospel with all along.

It is time to pray on our faces before a just and righteous Creator, who has had incomprehensible patience with both His wayward children, and the faithless, unbelieving, and rebellious lost among us for a long, long time, and whose cup of wrath is about to run over.  Do not wonder at why He is letting this happen now, wonder at His compassion in holding it off for so long!  Read the posts, watch the videos that the Lord led me to, for sharing with you today, and grasp the fact that whether it is Obama, or whether it is Romney, there is a trajectory that has already been set, a takedown that is already in motion like the charges that took down Tower 7, and this election, November 6th, could even be the detonation button.  So it won’t matter which candidate wins.  It won’t matter if mass uprisings disrupt voting, and martial law is implemented now, or Obama goes quietly and the charade of “peace and safety” commences a little longer, because mark the words of scripture:

For when they shall say, Peace and safety; then sudden destruction cometh upon them, as travail upon a woman with child; and they shall not escape.

I look back over the posts for October alone, and the “contractions” sure seem to be coming fast.  There is no cosmic Tocolytic that exists to stop it.

*****************

Election software company Scytl on the run from the Free Press, from one fake
address to the next

CBS News affiliate calls 2012 presidential race for Barack Obama weeks ahead of  election

Mitt Romney’s 13 Globalist  “Working Groups” Exposed

Romney’s Foreign Policy Advisors Exposed as Globalists
Dear Father, forgive us.  Help us continue to occupy, being about the Father’s business.  Prepare us for the days ahead, make us what we ought to be, and help us to stand, wearing the armor, to the end, for it is in the name of JESUS CHRIST alone, that this blogger prays, Amen.

I should add; I believe in the pre-tribulation rapture.

I sought the Lord and He Heard me….

….and dellivered me from all my fears. Psalm 34:41

Prayer is the forerunner of mercy.  Turn to sacred history, and you will find that scarcely ever did great mercy come to this world unheralded by supplication.–Spurgeon

I write about and link to some scary stuff.  Everyone goes through their own process as they absorb and allow themselves to face hard realities.  As Christians, there should be no fear associated with the conditions of Prophecy in Scripture which are coming to fruition all around us.  But with each new development, things grow more serious and ominous.  Pray.

Pray for unsaved loved ones and neighbors.  Witness the gospel to them, and pray for mercy.  As we pray for mercy, it may mean we remain here under these conditions a little longer while God continues to stay His wrath, so that a few more might be saved.  Do not be afraid if you are saved and under the blood.  As long as you are serving the Lord, it is not necessary for you to marinate in constant conscious awareness of the lateness of the hour.  That may not be your calling, as it is mine and others’. God has promised to see us through, (and walk through with us) anything He calls upon you to endure. But whatsoever you do, do heartily as unto the Lord.  Work out your own salvation “in fear and trembling” be a light, and trust in the Lord who hears and sees.  He has everything well in hand.